The Monkeyface News

Herring 2012

Stephen sends this picture of pickled herring.  He caught his fish on Pier 32 after my tour was over. Yum yum.  

 

Okay.  Time to put the fork in this puppy and call it done. I'm officially herring-ed out.  It was too bad about the commercial fresh fish permit, but hey, you can't win 'em all.  Nevertheless, it was quite a banner year for net throwers.  McCovey Cove/Embarcadero, Coyote, Kincaid's, Paradise, San Quentin and even Point Richmond have all had some pretty good spawns. Only thing I didn't see was a nice Sausalito run.  And what's up with Candlestick?  Anybody know?  I'll never forget the biggest spawn I ever saw was four years ago on Super Sunday.  So hopefully that will be repeated.  Though at this point I am only a spectator. 

 

Kent sends this picture of his herring in mid grill.  Learned a lot about grilling small fish this winter.  The secret folks, is in wood chips and super high heat.  I mean, like 900 degrees and whatnot.  Haven't ever had much success pan searing Pacific herring.  They always turn to mush. But a super hot grill works like a charm!

 

Anyway, nothing major to report here, just thought I'd share a few pix from the herring tours and crazy days in pursuit of small fishes.  

 

 

Even taking into account that the folks pictured below were fishing totally irresponsibly, taking way too many fish, and possibly even selling them somewhere (what else do you do with that many fish?  Feed an army?), let's stop and consider for a moment how many they actually took in two days... a robust estimate would be 1 ton.  Okay maybe one and a half.  3 thousands pounds.  That seems like a lot until you compare it to what a single herring boat catches in one day.  Somewhere between 5 and 15 tons. And the total herring quota is what? I forget, 1,900 tons or something.  At least these folks are eating them here, (males and females!) not shipping 'em all off to Japan for 200 bucks a ton.  Not that I begrudge those guys their quota.  At this point they're only fishing 5 percent of the projected biomass. I'm just saying... to not allow a limited commercial throw net fishery is... well... ludicrous.

Anyway... here's what it looked like out there:

                                                         McCovey Cove Jan 2012

 

                       Same day.  Pier 32,  Jan 2012, Champion de la Banana on the prowl

 

Speaking of the Champion here's 25 seconds of him (below). Which should illicit a few smiles from the regulars. Oh yeah, and BTW, that is in fact a fish checker (Ed) on his knees counting herring (in photo above).  So at least part of the day's catch was entered into a database somewhere.

 

 

 

And that's going to do it for my herring posts.  I'm done.  February is four days off and you all should know what that means... 

                                                        C. sordidus

 

 

And (towards the end of the month) this little guy:

                                                             S. Starski

 

So stay tuned!  And remember there's plenty of other websites out there if you want to read about sexier game fish like Marilyn, Ava, Rita and Lana.

Kirk-out

 

 

 

Productus

 

 

Haiku # 2,765

Cancer productus

Intellectual of crabs

And yet so macho

 

Got pinched again last week by a large red rock crab.  The feeling can only be likened to having a car door slammed on your finger.  The scream that emanates from my mouth when a rock crab gets me is the loudest un-amplified sound I have ever produced.  And for those who have heard me sing or play the tuba that's saying something.

 

         Now I finally know why he's screaming.

 

Reinventing the crab trap this week.  I mean seriously.  If you are a rock crab anywhere in the Bay Area you are in deep trouble.  When I say "reinventing the crab trap" I am being inaccurate. I myself reinvented nothing.  What I did was something I should've done long ago.  I handed the project over to the Leonardo da Vinci of metal.  Jerry Bonnafair.

 

Jerry Bonnafair in his Oakland Studio, with daughter Isabella and the Sabbatinni column wave machine we built for my puppet troupe several years ago.  Note Jerry's hand made banjo leaning against the wall.  In addition to playing and building banjos, Jare is a talented old time fiddler and a disciple of the great NC old tyme legend, Tommy Jerrell... oh why not... here's part of Les Blank's tribute, a beautiful little film in the opine of the MFN editorial machine.

 

 

 

Those of you who have read the print version of Monkeyface News #4 will remember Jerry as the unfortunate machinist/welder who gets to bring all my half-baked ideas to fruition.  So several years ago when I was starting out in night smelting, having no idea what an A-frame net was, I went to Jerry and had him build what I thought would be the ultimate smelt killing device.  The Lombard-Bonnafair Knuckle Breaker (AKA: The Blue Meanie).  So Jerry built exactly what I asked for: a horifying 50 pound tool with a scissor hinge perfect for breaking knuckles, and an 8 inch spike on the bottom for piercing human feet (I mistakenly thought that an A-frame net would need to be anchored in the sand!).  I caught a total of 6 smelt with this miserable device--and nearly crippled myself in the process.
 
 

                              The Bonnafair/Lombard knuckle-crusher, aka Blue Meanie

Again this is all explained in great detail in the print versions of the MFN.  The ridiculous sand crab trap (Marilyn Death Hammer) I designed, the steel clam tube (AKA: Lumbago Death Tube) that still juts defiantly from the mud of HMB, like excaliber unsheathed! Not to mention the mudsucker trap otherwise known as the Lombard-Bonnafair Shin Wrecker!  (They say the echoes of my screams are still heard in the Dumbarton salt ponds).

     Not very good at capturing mudsuckers, but if you need to lose a little blood, this is your baby.

Anyway, where was I?  The problem is, that for all his metalurgical skills Jerry Bonnafair is not really a clammer or a night smelter or a mudsucker fisherman.  And so he just went ahead and followed my instructions (to a tee).  Of course, I have no business designing anything made of metal when I am standing within 100 yards of someone of Jerry's genius.

 

 Marilyn Death Hammer.  A sand crab trap to end all sand crab traps.  Breaker of human spines.

 

    {For the full story behind all these misbegotten fishing tools, order your copy of MFN # 4 now!}

 

And so after my early failures in rock crabbing I ended up at Jerry's shop in Oakland.  We were there because, well, frankly it's hard to find 3.25 inch rings.  Rock crab traps must have escape rings.  And those rings can be as small as 3.25 inches.  Too many medium sized rockies were escaping from our dungy traps.  So Jerry made a template to bend steel rod into perfect 3.25 inch rings. Then he set about welding cross bars and weights on all the doors of our modified dungy traps.  Then we went out on the water again and discovered that even with weighted doors and 3.25 inch rings rock crabs tend to pull a Houdini when the bait is gone.  So overnight soaks were useless.  We tried Promars, Danielsons, Octagons and standard circular dungy pots.  All with mixed results.  Then Mikey saw some top entry stone crab pots online last month and so we started thinking along those lines.  I contacted a few rock crab biologists who confirmed that top entry traps worked well for rock crabs down south (where there is actually a fairly large fishery for yellows and browns).  

 

                                Stone crab trap

 

Discussed all this with Jerry and the next day he presented me with plans for a folding, totally portable, top entry rock crab trap.  So I went out and bought a 100 foot roll of 12 gauge PVC coated mesh, and started making traps at Jerry's shop--following his template.  Doing the math on it, including bait trays, cheap line (BTW, cheap cotton line sinks!) pool noodle buoys and zip ties, we can produce one total crabbing unit for 10 dollars.

Bam!  

 

  Jerry Bonnafair builds the template for a folding top-entry rock crab pot

 

Are they easy to make?  No. Is it a lot of work?  Yes.  But I've got the time right now, and frankly the biggest issue with rock crabbing is lost gear.  Obviously, these guys don't live on flat sandy bottoms like dungies.  So it makes no sense whatsoever to fish with expensive gear that's gonna get humg up on rocks all day. And the amazing thing about Jerry's design is that we can easily fit 100+ of these folding gizmos on an 18 foot whaler.

                      Cutting wire, and sorting the pieces... Jan 2012

 

Anyway, got yet another tour in HMB today. Will post some cool footage of the crazy downtown SF herring spawn that lasted 4 days!  Talked to monkeyface inside man Champion de la Banana yesterday (1/20/12)  and he was still catching 'em. 

Go Niners!

--Kirk-out

 

Tour On Saturday 1/21

Not completely sure on this.  Kind of thought it was a brown Irish lord, any sculpin experts out there?

Got plenty of room Saturday for my Mega Low-tide Mussel/Clam Tour down in Princeton CA.  Usually this tour is sold out but I had six cancellations and rather than cancel the tour completely, I thought what the hell, I'll post it here see if I can get a few more peeps.  Here's the link to BPT: Kirk's Tickets

 

 

Pre-Columbian Pogey

 

Not Even Looking To Break Even

 

It's true kids.  No matter what they tell you. Life is occasionally improved by the slow ingestion of quality intoxicants.

 

 

The commercial cast net uber-fresh herring idea is now officially dead.  RIP.  They stabbed it with their steely knives (but they still couldn't kill the beast. The beast rages on. I am the beast. 666. That is the number of herring I could probably ever catch in one day. Pounds now, not tons). And then they e-mailed to tell me I lost.

Hi Kirk,

I just got the word from Captain _______ that Legal has made a decision (went all of the way to the top of the Law Enforcement Branch too).  They gave cast netting a thumbs down (see below). Budget cuts might effect the regulatory cycle but I think that DFG will have to address the fresh fish fishery and that would be the time to introduce cast netting as an authorized method of take for herring.

Sorry for the bad news and the fact that it took so long to get it to you.

Signed ____________________

                                Herring gill netters getting their fish in McCovey cove
 

From Enforcement:

Dear _________________

I spoke with Legal at length last week about the issues of nets and weekend fishing. I also spoke with Assistant Chief __________ after he discussed this with the Chief of Patrol ____________. Although they agree that the impact of the fresh fish herring fishery is minimal, the fishery is still bound by the regulations established in CCR Title 14 Section 163. The only authorized method of take for the fresh fish permittees is a set gill net no longer than 65 fathoms long, as described in CCR Title 14 Section 163(f)(2)(A). There is also no fishing allowed on weekends in San Francisco Bay (noon Friday through 5:00 PM Sunday night), as described in CCR Title 14 Section 163(h)(5).
 

                                                            My Kind of CCR

If Mr. Lombard wants the regulations changed he will have to submit a regulation change proposal to the Fish and Game Commission.

And of course this is exactly what I will do.  However, there is no denying it is a temporary setback. A loss of sorts.

 

But the loss is ours, collectively.  Because no one gets these gorgeous, scale-on, clear eyed, throw-netted herring siting in my cooler. Except me. And my friends.

Instead everybody else gets the shook, sucked, crushed and pulverized variety.  Oh well.  Wait till next year.  A baseball cliche if ever there was one.

 

McCovey Cove

 

521 homers.  1555 rbi.  Rest assured when this man strode to the plate, first basemen were not in their happy place.  Did anyone out there ever witness a Willie McCovey line drive?  I once heard one called by Ralph Kiner in like 1979.  Towards the end.  Solo homer in a meaningless game.  The pitch comes in.  Kiner goes:  "It's a line drive.  It's in the gap.  It's gone... and that my friends was a Willie McCovey home run."  

Today I stood and watched 100 tons of herring gill-netted in McCovey Cove. They are now getting 200-300 dollars a ton. (So let's see, what does the math-compromised MFN editorial machine come up with?) Which means each boat made about 2,000 dollars for ten hours of fishing--if that. And they came down from Washington. And how much is the permit? 2,000 dollars? More? And the deckhand... how much does he get? And gas? Upkeep on nets and winches and motors? Wow. Mooring fees?  The SF herring fishery is not a growth industry. Let's just put it that way. In 1994 they got what?  $2,000-$3,000 a ton?

Then why the hell not let me catch 25 pounds?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHH!!!

I don't even need to break even. That's what no one understands about me.

I'M NOT EVEN LOOKING TO BREAK EVEN!

All I'm trying to do is show people how a herring might be fished.  Small quantities, high price.  Feel me?

 

The 1 Hundred and 1th Ton

 

         McCovey Cove.  Herring boat.  Gill net set.  Jan 18th 2012.

 

I said it was 100 tons but really it was more like 101 tons.  Maybe 102.  The Chinese and Vietnamese evidently like herring. Would love to find out how they are preparing it!  (A little help from some of my Vietnamese fishing brothers here?)

My crazy MFN operative # 007, the one known as Pissed-off Pete, looks up at me out of this virile mass Asiatic manhood and screams: "C'mon Kirk!  White man gotta stand up!"  This was one of the funniest things I have ever heard. I am still laughing. The absurdity of it. Poor Pete, the first man to throw a cast net on C. Pallasi inside SF Bay, swallowed in a crowd of... very talented net throwers. Led sinkers winging thru the air.  A very funny sight to behold.  

The average guy on that pier today threw twice as many times as Tim Lincecum does in a typical outing. Seriously. The fish were sort of thick and then not thick. 10 pounds and then half a pound. Like that.

 

"I just love this... I just love being near this."

 

I must stop. I must dig deeper here. I must digress. I was standing there today and one of my favorite regulars was standing just beyond me talking to someone else.  His name is Tom.  He's one of those dudes has a very common name but when you're standing somewhere with a lot of '365s' (that's the name we give to people who fish every day of the year, yo), and you say: "Tom says the stripers are running thick at Candlestick" every one knows who you're talking about.

 

 

Anyway, I was standing there in the thick of it all and I heard Tom say something like: "I just love this... I just love being near this." That was it. Milt in the water. Eggs on the rocks. Fish sparkling in the shallows. Herring shakers on the gill net boats tapping their staccato rhythm. 43 some odd people throwing nets. Scales flying. Chinese music from someone's Buick (the trunk open and filled with blue plastic bins). I dunno, it was a wild scene.  And really, when you add up the ton or so that was caught by the net flingers, what does it really amount to when compared to a single boat? 

Lot of people I'd never seen before out there.  Jeez, I even ran into Bubba from HMB. Bubba is a fire extinguisher guy. And is the most perfect embodiment of bubba-hood ever created. Bubba was checking fire extinguishers at the ballpark, and had some weird cioppino wagon he was hauling. Seriously. Big Bubba was trafficking in ciopino. WTF? Anyway. I gave Bubba about 7 pounds or something. He goes: "did you see all those guys on the other side?? {of McCovey Cove}" 

And poor Pissed-off Pete, sighing miserably and trying with mixed success to elbow his way to the prime spot. "Its like the battle of Keh Sanh!" He screams.

Nets whirling through the air.  Fish dying everywhere.  Bad day to be a herring.  Good day to be a herring eater.

  

                                                   Herring eaters

 

Ayala

 

                     Some Miwoks

 

In my dreams tonight I will be sailing through The Gate onboard the San Carlos in 1775.  I will look towards land and see the grizzly munching on the sea lion carcass that they all decribed, and the tule canoes docked where Ghiridelli is now. And, and... the endless forests of tule grass, pintails, canvas backs and geese. Great shrieking clouds of geese. Horizon to horizon clouds. Vaults of geese. And a plump, well-fed populace given to laughter, steamed mussels and interesting head dresses. I must see this. I must know what it was. I want to catch a pre-Columbian pogey!

 

Seriously, this is a picture of the San Carlos, hard to believe they'd have all sails at full spread so close to the shore tho.  Is that supposed to be the Gate?  Pt. Diablo?

 

I want to catch a pre-Columbian pogey!

I want to catch a pre-Columbian pogey!

And if I don't get to catch a pre-Columbian pogey, I'm going to scream and cry!

Imagine for a moment the sturgeon abundance in 1775.  Green sturgeon! Green sturgeon abundance. Oxymoronic at this point. Not in 1775. The CPUE for green sturgeon in 1775 was probably like .50 per hour. 12 per day. Imagine the clamming in HMB in 1775. I wonder how hard it would be to reconstruct the tide on August 4th 1775 when Ayala sailed in? August 4th.... hmmm... imagine what surf smelt abundance was on Aug 4th 1775. I think maybe this year I'll throw a party for the bay on August 4th. Who wants to come? We'll regale ourselves with stories about the old days. To hell with the present. Forget about the future. I want to live in the past!

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!

Now I'm sitting here. The phone just rang. Eric Lee's still on the herring. Live Eric! Live!

 

Of Course

 

                         herring otolith

 

FYI:  They've found herring otoliths in 8,000 year old Indian burial mounds. No surprise there.

 

The 1/1000

 

                                                    Yes.  On Montgomery street.

In parting I will say this. I may not know what a summer run of Chinook salmon looks like, I may not comprehend former pintail abundance, Grizzly bears on Montgomery St., or what Aquatic Park was like when it was full of spartina grass, native oysters and clapper rails. But I sure as hell can visualize what a herring run must've looked like. Since I'm intimately familiar with that meagre 1/1000th that's left to us.

Anyhoo, I may yet hold out for time machines and vistas of impossible former abundance but while I'm doing it, I will profess my love for what remains.  Tom said it best:

I just love it. I just love being near it.

Kirk-out.

Jan 18, 2012

The Cycle Of Life

 

                                                            Loren's buckets

 

So we had a major herring spawn in Marin this week.  The spawn lasted two whole days and nights... (might actually have been three!)  The pickling liquid is boiling even as I write this.   Other than myself and a few select friends, there was no one to witness it... no one except of course the 12-15 herring boats who's gill net shakers can be heard in the distance throughout the movie below, and maybe a thousand sea gulls.  It really is such a beautiful thing to behold... hope this very short movie captures some of it!

 

                                                Herring boats Jan 5th 2012

 

 

I have to say, it was quite a trip to show up there and see the pier completely empty.  Had it all to myself. Became like a party for Kirk's friends the rest of the day.  Thanks Mike C. for the call... anyway, here's the latest cinematic masterpiece:

 

 

Niche Markets

 

                                                              Rockies...

 I was talking to a dungeness crab fisherman at the dock in Princeton and he goes: "rock crabs are garbage, I got no interest in that."  

And that's just fine with me, buddy!  

It all comes down to what your particular version of the American Dream happens to be.  Mine is unique, I think, in that it doesn't include a lot of expensive stuff.  And because of that, I can make underground, under-utilized, non-mainstream fisheries work for me.  But not everyone can.  

It's funny though, I have to say, commercial fishing a string of hoop nets! You guys think I'm kidding but that appears to be the best way to capture rock crabs (more on this later). 

Even funnier, since we started doing this with our buyer (and benefactor!) I'm seeing rock crabs all over town.  Copy cats! Got more demand for eels than I know what to do with. Got people talking about the different kinds of smelts (FYI: there's a huge demand for jacksmelt... yes, jacksmelt. Worms and all!)

Anyway, Mikey and I have been dropping pots everyday.  Okay, let me rephrase that.  Mikey's been dropping pots everyday, I've been tagging along occasionally.  But, we are starting to learn a few things:

1.  rock crabs are smarter than dungies

2.  rock crabs are very good at escaping from conventional crab pots

3.  hoop nets work well because you have to pull them up every 15 minutes and so the crabs don't have a chance to escape.

4.  getting pinched by a rock crab deeply sucks (their claws are designed to break clams, yo).

5.  we need a different kind of pot.

It's weird, even with weighted doors and 3.25 inch escape rings we can't seem to keep these buggers in the traps over night.  Drop a few hoop nets on rocky bottom and you catch more rock crabs in an hour than you do with a 48 hour soak.  Very strange.  I think what's going on here is that rockies unlike dungies evolved to deal with getting in and out of holes.  So as soon as they eat all the bait they start searching the cage for a way out... and they figure out the door quite easily.  I have this image in my brain of one rock crab, the leader of the jail break, holding the trap door open while all the others escape... might have to sink a GO PRO down there... anyone wanna volunteer a camera?

Anyhoo... as far as fishing goes, this is what I've been up to lately (see movie).  Nothing stupendous but some nice footage of our little operation, the wonderful 18 foot Whaler that has been provided for us by our crab buyer, Kenny (mensch of the 7 seas), and the foggy shores of the local coastline.  I think it's fair to say that in a month or two we will be able to triple our catch.  

Again, if there are any former commercial rock crab fishermen out there reading this, I'd love to pick your brain for a few minutes... beers on me.

Anyway, here's my first movie since steelheading on the Trinity...

Happy New Year!

PS: if any of you have photos from my tours down in Halfmoon Bay/Princeton/Mavericks I'd really appreciate you forwarding them to me, especially that monster cabezon Mikey got poke poling!

 

Thanks

 

 

 

Wow.  Thanks to all the guys who commented below.  And to Loren Wilson for blanketing Pillar Point and Oyster Point with signs.  In truth what I really need is a photograph of the thieves.  It's a week later and I'm still fuming.  It's the principle of the thing.  Just assuming it's okay to pull in someone else's gear!  Mikey of course is taking a more Buddhist approach.  

Let it go, Kirk. Life is transient. All these things must pass.

Sure but not before I kick some ass!

Oh yeah.  The CF number appears to be somewhat truncated.  It's missing two letters at the end. Mikey points out that his own boat similarly lacks these "alphas" (really Mikey?  WTF?) and swears those were the only numbers on the side of the offending boat.  But who knows maybe they purposefully obscured their CF number?

{Anyway.  Please don't go after anyone who has a similar number or boat.  I will be pursuing this thing for a while.  And rest assured, as soon as they tear the signs down, I will put them back up}.

In the mean time we'd appreciate it if you guys could keep that (partial) CF number in mind: 8921, and the make: 18-20 ft Arima.  And remember to snap a photo or better yet get footage!

 

On To Happier Subjects

 

      Found this chart on a site called "corporate document repository."  Lots of info on kippering.

I'm fielding about 6 e-mails per week about herring, which proves my theory that the time for a local market for these guys has come.  Of course the new Herring For Fresh Fish Market License is now up and running, which only means that someone else out there has the same idea.  Unfortunately, I am still waiting to hear from DFG whether or not I can use the license I bought in Sacramento. Why, one wonders, would the license be listed as "open access" if it requires a gill net permit? Go figya!

Beyond all this, I am wondering about the fat content of our local herring.  

(Yes, it's true, in my down time I sit around wondering about the fat content of herring).

They sure seem like "spents" to me. ("Spents" is the kipper industry term for fatless, post-spawn herring) Nevertheless, Mr. Niko Von Sharky, former don of the now defunct Boer Kayak Mafia, raves on and on about the high quality of his home-smoked kippers, and having sampled them myself last year, I have to say I am in agreement--they were awesome, yo.  Not sure if they would pass the test of official kipperdom.  Evidently this is a very deep science, akin to wine making.  Check out this site, for more info than you could possibly want on the subject of kippered herring:  Kippers

 

                                                 Von sharky's kippers from 2010

 

Eel Monger

As it turns out my plan to commercial fish only for unusual local species is starting to work out--if beer and gas money = working out.  Got the rock crab thing going pretty well and have found a market for monkeyface eels.  Yesterday I caught a total of 14 eels in two hours of fishing.  Kind of amazing to see the response from a few Bay Area chefs on this.  They kind of go crazy over monkeyface.  And what is more, they've been serving it skin-on! Something few if any fishermen have ever done.  One sushi chef actually prepared monkeyface sashimi for me.  Yikes.  That was a little intense.  Kind of a weird consistency, and it sort of slithered down my throat.  But the other chefs loved it that way, so who am I to argue? 

And one other thing. After I dropped off my gutted eels at the receiver, one of them evidently came alive on the fillet table!  Smacked on the head, gutted, transported 20 miles and still alive!  This of course is no big surprise to poke polers.  But imagine the poor fillet guy.  As my fish buyer said:  "You have to understand Kirk, Latin cultures are a bit phobic about serpents to begin with... but poor Caesar (the fillet man) to have a creature with a broken neck and no guts come alive while being filleted... that's understandably disturbing."

Herring

Not sure what to say.  The herring are not spawning.  No rain.  Waiting and waiting and waiting... good things come to those who...

Kirk-out

 

Robbery On The High Seas

 

Merry Christmas.  

Now let's get down to brass tacks.  

I'm angry... and you wouldn't like me when I'm angry.

The white Arima CF# 8921 that commonly fishes Princeton Harbor is a boatload of dirtbag, thieving, losers.  See below for CF number, make of boat, and physical description.

 

 

                    Thieves:

                    CF# 8921 (might be missing two letters at the end)

                    18-20 foot white Arima

 

 

Mikey came up on our pots in HMB the other day and found 4 guys in a white Arima emptying them out for us.  When he approached their boat, eyes afire, steam shooting from his ears, he could, understandably, barely contain himself.  For five days Mikey and I have been testing the waters around Halfmoon Bay for rock crabs.  To see if we can make a go of it as commercial red rock crab fishermen. (being poor, the only fisheries we can get into are the open access ones).  Everyone thinks I'm crazy... but this is, in these parts anyway, an underutilized and under appreciated fishery.  Rockies just need a good salesman.  The claws are as good as stone crab claws.  We've been trying to see if we can drum up some interest, but first we have to see if we can actually catch them (open to suggestions on this BTW. So far we are only scoring 3-4 jumbos per pot, and loads of mediums and smalls.  Where the hell do the jumbos congregate in bigger numbers?  Deeper water?  Someone talk to here.)

 

 

Anyway, Mikey keeps calling me and saying: "I don't understand it, I've been setting pots on rocky bottom for a week, and I go out there, pick up our pots and there's nothing in 'em!?"  

So, the other day he goes out there after soaking pots all night. And catches these guys red handed, dumping the contents of one of our pots onto their boat!  Dude smiles at Mike and says: "We are doing you a favor, taking only rock crabs!"  He then opens his cooler to show Mikey how good he is at stealing our crabs!  The cooler is loaded to the brim (hey, I'm not so overloaded with anger that I fail to see the humor here... but still!)

Do you believe the audacity of these dirtbags?  In a boat that costs 20 times what Mikey's boat costs. Guys that don't even need to consider doing crazy things like rock crab fishing to pay the rent... Oh man... I'm fuming here.

 

                     "You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

 

Thing is my buddy and former colleague JB has been telling me that a boat fitting this description has been coming in all week with a cooler filled to the top with rock crabs.  No dungies and no crab pots onboard.  And all this time we're banging our heads against the wall, wasting money in fuel, launch fees bait, etc... and wondering why we can't find the rockies... unbelievable.

Do you guys feel my outrage here?  Good thing for the crab thieves I wasn't on the boat that day.  I have a much worse temper than Mikey.  It's all me Irish blood.  I might have flogged them with an eel or harpooned them with a poke pole or something.

I mean, even if you don't particularly care for rock crabs, isn't it just a universal sin to mess with someone else's fishing gear?  I mean, if I was fishing a pier and someone picked up my rod and reeled it in for me, there had better be a damned good reason for it.  Like a seagull caught in the line or something.  If that person then informed me that they were doing me a favor by getting rid of a walleye perch, or say a rock crab, I would, by unwritten pier fishing etiquette, be fully justified in punching that person in the nose. Would I not?

Anyway, Mike reported it to the authorities but there is little they can do since they didn't see it.  At Loren Wilson's suggestion, however, I am posting this on the internet, in hopes that someone will repost it on the board at Coastside (I can't remember my access codes. Same with Fish Sniffer, Highliners etc.) a beer and a small jar of pickled herring to anyone who does this for me.  Feel free to email me when you want to claim your reward.

My personal feeling is that if law enforcement can't do anything about a bunch of thieves...

 

 

... maybe the fishermen can stink-eye them, vibe them, and cast aspersions on them, till they leave the water and don't come back.

Man, I'm mad.

In fact I'm heading down to Princeton today to plaster some flyers around the harbor.  If nothing else I'm hoping to embarrass the hell out of these guys.

So... in spite of my inclination to keep things warm and cozy around the holidays.  I am posting the CF number again.  If anyone sees these guys and gets a photo, I'll post that too!

 

1. CF#: 8921 (I say we're missing two alphas here but Mike says not)

2. Make Of Boat: White Arima, approx. 18-20 ft.

3. Four males in their 40s.  

Beyond that I can only describe these guys by general ethnic type. And I prefer not to do that, as I don't want good fishermen of the same ethnicity to be needlessly harassed.  

Kirk-out  :(

Today...

 ... I will poke-pole for the fifth consecutive day.  Ha!  I defy the gawds of adulthood, even now, at this late stage of the game.  

Anyway, I've never done this before... poked 5 days in a row.  An abandonment of responsibility bad for even me.

 

        Catching a lot of reasonable sized "bolinas" intertidally, of late.

 

Poem 2,876:

 

He poke-poled five days in a row

Until, like some crusty werecrab-semi-mammal clinging intertidally to sheer rock faces and barnacled overhangs, he became one with the eel.

and its mysteries became common knowledge to him

and into them he plunged

remarking in his post eel mongering memoirs

that really nothing quite surpassed bare ectothermism

and it's unexpected pleasures (all of them blue or green...)

and the fascinating possibilities of a totally prehensile life.

 

Which Is By Way Of Saying That I Am...

 

... now intertidal about 20% of my waking hours.

Recent things of note:

Found one of those juvy salmon sharks on the beach recently but couldn't find my goddamned camera.

Saw people abusing the resource three days ago.  (Or was it two?  I can't remember the days have morphed into one single extended low tide).  In this case it was sea anenomes. (I mean, why?  Someone tell me. Why would anyone need to eat a green anenome?)

I broke the current hook and line record for northern clingfish. (See picture above).  

More Monday.

Still waiting on the herring.

 

 

Updates from my clandestine operatives in the south bay (agents 007 and 008):

"Pissed-off" Pete says herring don't generally spawn twice in one spot... and that the spawn in the areas around SFO will be correspondingly small this year... hmmm... hope he's wrong.  Champion de la Banana promises to call me the moment it goes off... and since he's down there every day. I think there is a good chance he will be my Paul Revere this year.  I should point out that there are some fairly huge flocks of cormorants in the south bay right now.  Also, it's been a few years since Candlestick Park had a decent spawn, let us not forget that a lot of these pre-spawn fish are sitting in the deep channel off of Hunter's Point right now.  Four years ago, on Superbowl Sunday the herring spawned directly under Candlestick Pier.  Only two people were there to witness it.  The author (as an employee of Pacific States Marine Fisheries Commission) and an elderly Cantonese gentleman who filled up an entire garbage can single handedly. Must've weighed 300 pounds.  I'll never forget it.  When I asked this guy who he intended to feed 300 pounds of herring to, he shrugged and said: "Everybody!"

                                                               Herring roe

A Fish and Game herring biologist tells me he has been marking big schools "in the bay," but that these schools were mixed with jacksmelt and 'chovies.  

In short... there's plenty of fish in the city right now... just not ready to spawn yet.  The Monkeyface News prediction:

Any day now!

But I think it might take one more big rain... 

And guess what's predicted for tomorrow?

--Kirk-out

 

 

 

 

Brigitte Bardot

                                 The Author here pictured kissing Brigitte Bardot

 

{If you are new to this site and have no idea what I'm talking about with this Brigitte Bardot stuff go here:   The Code Explained}

                                                Got her!

 

Sing in me oh muse and through me tell the tale of that fisherman,

who long ago plied the streams and rivers of our nation with flyrod,

who rolled ferrules for Scott,

who hand crafted his own graphite 8-weight, with custom eccentric cork handle,

who learned the art of fly casting from his grandfather...

who learned from his grandfather.

who learned from his.

 

{MFN parenthetic aside # 2,189:  My Gramps, Milton Watson, (the one everybody's looking at) in the 1930s posing with comedian George Mann.  Mann was the taller half of the Barto and Mann Vaudeville dance team ("the comedy kings of Vaudeville").  I guess the joke here is that all the other guys in the picture are standing up on a ledge in order to look down at Mann who stood 6 foot 6 in his socks. Mann's partner Barto was only 4 foot 11, so one can kind of imagine the nature of their act--which you gotta figure was pretty funny}.

A-hem where was I?  Oh right... the muse...

And tell me fair muse of the sad events which led this once proud fly-man to abandon the haughty aesthetics of his clan, and to take up the crude bamboo stick, and the duct tape, and the wire hanger. Those "tools of ignorance" (to quote Muddy Ruel) used in the capture of a slimy, algae-eating, bottom dweller.

      "...a slimy, algae-eating, bottom dweller."

 

And tell me fair muse how it came to pass that such a one as this, came to eschew catch and release, becoming instead, a rank thrower nets, a poker of poles... a harvester of sorrows!

Seriously though.  About halfway through yesterday's drift down the Trinity, Mikey turns to me and asks if I'd like to "try the flyrod," (as I had been complaining so vociferously about the 15 foot leader on the end of my bobber).  It's funny.  Kinda forgot how many thousands of hours I have logged fly fishing in my life. Started out at the age of 12.  My grandfather placing a newspaper under the elbow of my casting arm and telling me not to drop it.  After five minutes I was back in form.  I mean, I'll never be another Lefty Kreh, but still... I can drop the friggin bead-head within three feet of where I want it, 90 percent of the time.  And it was nice to remember that I possessed this ability.  Like a drunken Jedi, waking up one morning and remembering he was once pretty good with a light sabre.

 

                           Drunken Jedi

 

And then BAM!  Mikey put me on the fish and it was like... oh yeah... I remember this.  Why exactly did I give it up?

 

 

                                   Steelhead Mike D. and Friend.  Photo by Fishwife.

Now, sitting here at the MFN HQ, going over this past weekend's photos, I'm looking into that again--why I gave it up.  I think the reason I gave up fly fishing was because at some point it became impractical. Here I was living in SF with cool fish species all around me, plotting out my next trip to the Pleasant Valley Creek, or the Carson, wherein I would blow how much money on gas, lodging, food, etc? Meanwhile, pogies were thick in the drains, MF eels everywhere, rockfish, lingcod, herring etc etc etc. Feel me?

 

But the thing is, there really is no reason a pogie wouldn't take a fly.  Redtails and barreds readily do. Flyfishing for striped bass is, obviously, a common enterprise.  I wonder about grass rockfish and cabezon in tidepools. I mean why not?  Hell, maybe even a monkeyface would take a fly?  A kelp fly no doubt. Think of the possibilities here!

Anyway, this past weekend re-ignited the long dormant fires.  I felt kinda like Roy Hobbs out there. Now batting after a 15 year hiatus... Lombard of the Intertidal.

Anyway, here's a happy little video. (Scroll down) Don't be shy.  Give Mikey a call:  

                                    703-946-9567

Not only will he put you on the salmonids (in any river on the West Coast), he'll let you bring your accordion along for the ride... Seriously.

Kirk-out

  Having secured her first-ever Birgitte Bardot, the Fishwife serenaded her two favorite fishermen with accordion.
 

My first movie in a while.  Nothing crazy, just a nice day on the water.  Oh yeah, the sound track is Marty Robbins doing the old standard.  Fishwife on accordion.

Meanwhile, the herring are here.  No major spawns yet but they're sitting in the deep channels storing up fat, getting ready to spawn... more on this in a few days.

--Kirk-out